Friday, February 17, 2006
When you're riding a time machine far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window or it'll turn into a fossil.
Probably the first flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the long end of a stick.
Anytime I see something screech across the room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.
If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think like dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong. It's Hambone.
It's true that every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mousetrap snap, an angel gets set on fire.
Insted of studying for finals, what about going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway; that's my point.
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten, hot lava, forget 'em, cause man, they're gone.
Probably the saddest thing you'll ever see is a mosquito sucking on a mummy. Forget it, little friend.
Probably the first flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the long end of a stick.
Anytime I see something screech across the room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.
If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think like dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong. It's Hambone.
It's true that every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mousetrap snap, an angel gets set on fire.
Insted of studying for finals, what about going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway; that's my point.
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten, hot lava, forget 'em, cause man, they're gone.
Probably the saddest thing you'll ever see is a mosquito sucking on a mummy. Forget it, little friend.
4 Comments:
Are those from that book that Kimber had in her car?
Spencer
Internet baby, internet.
Ever heard the monologue that Reagan fellow (can't remember his first name) does about the peanut butter and jam in the same bottle?
I love that, Laverna. I have the Brian Reagan ( I have no idea if all those words are spelled correctly) comedy cd from my brother, with all his wiles, and man, it is a funny funny 80 minutes or so.
"Here lawyer lawyer lawyer! Sue, lawyer" "Brian, what are you doing??" "I'm just trying to make it fun."
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